Someday, you actually do break through the darkness, and the struggle, and the heart numbing business of mindlessly plodding along one foot in front of the other, just to keep going. You have to keep going for everybody else. And then one day, you keep going, for yourself.
Somehow, the truth breaks free from within you, that you are a person of great value, that you truly deserve better in life, and then you know that nobody can take that truth away. You earned it, learnt it, died to it, found new life through it, and it is the new you born out of hurt, and pain, and grief, and despair.
Only the faintest glimmer of hope kept you alive as you wrestled with tears and deep sorrow, wanting to be so much more, but not quite there yet. Then one day, almost like an epiphany, your eyes are opened to the truth of who you really are.
You are not a broken heart crushed underfoot or a broken body ravaged by disease. You are not some sad reflection of someone else's inability to love. You are so much more than all that. You are lovable, and you deserve better. Much, much better.
And nobody can ever take that truth away because now your eyes are open, your heart and soul are open, and the truth emerged from within you. "I deserve better" becomes your mantra. In everything in life, you tell yourself this and know it in your heart. You believe it entirely, and never again will anyone convince you otherwise. You won't let them.
In order to have survived all that life has thrown at you and to keep moving forwards, you close the doors on the past and know you deserve better because it's not just a comforting notion, it's the truth. And the truth sets you free.
Once you find that freedom you can never imagine not being free to believe in your own innate goodness and the fact that you deserve better, and you promise yourself that never again will your worth as a person be undermined or undervalued by anyone else.
You make a vow to yourself. To know yourself, to know your self worth, to be better, not bitter, and to live the life you truly deserve. Because you are awesome. It's the truth.
Thanks for reading,
Pav.
