Day 31 of A Month of Gratitude, #AMOG, and it's the last day today. Phew. It's been an experience, and I am #grateful for #gratitude. When I set out to be grateful for one thing in particular everyday, I hoped to develop a sense of thanksgiving, and a continued focus on what is in my life rather than missing from it by rewiring my brain through gratitude.
I also wanted to be more open, transparent, vulnerable and honest, because I believe in connection through all of that. I wrote and waffled on, or I made videos and waffled on; in short, no matter what medium I chose, I had plenty to say about the one thing I chose to focus on. One might think that finding that one thing is an easy task, but it wasn't, really. I spent up to an hour over the course of each day thinking about people, events, feelings, experiences... and trying to find that one thing that jumped out at me and said, "Be grateful for this!" There were a couple of days when my mind drew a blank, and I felt a little numb, and the whole gratitude exercise seemed tiring, but on those days I kept going, keeping it simple, and not thinking too deeply about things.
I found that on the days when I really stopped and thought things through, weighed things in my heart and chose to be grateful even if great feelings of gratitude did not appear at the surface or follow soon after... these days were especially vital, authentic, and important to me. Sometimes, I wept as I wrote about why I was grateful, and as I look back now, it was mostly about people, and the feelings they evoked in me that brought tears and healing to my memories and my heart. I chose to practice self compassion, and to be kind to myself in the midst of reliving pain, or a myriad of emotions that rose to the surface with recollections of moments past and their interface with the present.
Even though the month is over, I plan to continue being grateful, and sharing occasionally with my dear friends who have been very kind, encouraging and inspiring, and who have told me how much they enjoyed my posts and videos. Thank you for reading and watching, I am deeply appreciative, especially since it's all rather lengthy, and a bit of a commitment on your part. It has been such a meaningful exercise and experience for me, to have been able to share my life experiences with others and find that they have found their lives enriched too in some way.
One thing I struggled with along the way was writing about things that were in my life that others might not have had in theirs, or had lost, and I was aware that I might hurt or offend some folks who might feel I was rubbing it in. I decided to keep sharing anyway, because I spent many years in the shadow of others who resented the good things in my life, and I felt that I could never find my voice and express my truth, and it was suppressed. So now, I speak it, I hope others see it for what it is... someone who is struggling, as we all are, to make meaning of difficulty in life and choosing to be grateful and hoping others will be encouraged along their journey.
I'm not sure if it's FB's algorithms or an explosion of gratitude online, but I have seen so many others writing about things that they are grateful for, sharing their stories, posting videos, narrating their victories over life's struggles and rejoicing in all that they have been given in life. I rejoice with them, and I am so encouraged to be seeing others practicing gratitude in their own way.
Gratitude leads to contentment; when we see all the good in our lives we can dampen the need or want for more to fill the emptiness of our hearts. If we look to the Giver of all good things, we rejoice because we know He watches over us, our days are in His hands, and we are truly the Beloved of God. I have been grateful for many things these past 31 days, but I think I have gravitated towards people, and feelings evoked by people, nature, and experiences in life. I have come to understand myself and my priorities better, my idiosyncracies and my thought processes too, and best of all, I have come to see how central gratitude is to my well being.
Spending an hour everyday thinking and writing about gratitude has helped me see all the good in my life, and to remain focussed on it. I remain grateful for some not very good things too... because that's my way of integrating everything and looking for the silver lining helps heal my heart. I intend to keep at it, to remain grateful and to be content. I hope you will consider a season of gratitude, no matter how short, as a way to rewire your brain, learn about yourself, be open to the world, and be content. Share with others or journal it on your own, whatever works best for you. Be grateful! 🙏❤
A pix of us on second son's birthday in September 2020. Time to take a new one soon!
#AMOG #AMonthOfGratitude #GratefulForGratitude #Contentment #RewireBrain #Thanksgiving #Meaningful #Enriching #Encouragement #Integration #WellBeing #MentalHealth #Authentic #Vulnerable #Honest #Healing #SelfCompassion #Kindness #BelovedOfGod #ContinuedGratitude #IMadeItThroughDayThirtyOne
Thanks for reading,
Pav
No comments:
Post a Comment